Michigan women routinely snooker their men into collecting castoreum to make Mac 'n tofu. Their reasoning: "A beaver may only slash ya with its teeth. But if you're here when my mood is on the downswing, I'll beat your knobgoblin to a pulp with a tire iron."

That said, plenty of women collect castoreum themselves. As a fellow Presbyterian church lady put it, "When I'm having a hot flash on a Winter day, I've got two ways to cool down. I can get icky sticky stuff from a beaver and put it in a casserole. Or I can drive down a country road at sixty miles per hour with my head out the window like a dog. Much as I like Up North winters, I'd rather eat something which came out of a beaver booty."