But according to the Florida Board of Education’s new rules. — The Florida Board of Education¹ wants Sunday Schools to use Old Testament stories to help kids understand current affairs. The story of Noah, for example. “God said unto Noah, the earth is filled with violence. I [shall] flood waters upon the earth, and every thing shall die. But thou shalt…

First he took on the Magic Kingdom. Now it’s the Kingdom of Heaven.

They were already committed. Now they’ve actually been committed. — A judge has ruled that the Michigan Republican Party is incapable of rational thinking. He’s ordered it to be committed to a psychiatric hospital for treatment until it can handle its own affairs. The order has been suspended, however, at the request of patients at the state’s facilities. “I see…

But Evangelical Christians trash Christ, prefer Trump. — Jesus Christ, a one-time spiritual entrepreneur, and chief marketing officer of a divine enterprise founded by his Heavenly Father, has announced that he’s a Republican candidate for President of the United States. He figures White Evangelicals will automatically support him. Yet to his chagrin, there are already signs they won’t…

She jumps on it with boyfriends, then assumes the cosplay position. — My name is Piper La Grange, I’m a ten-year-old female Border Terrier, and I’m here to talk with my fellow bitches and boners about a problem: keeping our humans off our furniture. Take your living room sofa. It’s not just where you watch poodle porn on DOGTV. Its where your…

The Michigan town which used a Florida law to ban books in the Bible. — A Michigan city has enacted a book-banning law which puts the Florida bill its based on to shame. It requires libraries to remove any book which makes someone feel uncomfortable. The initial targets were school textbooks which encouraged “recreational” sex, and presented “negative” views of U. S. History. But recently…

And replaced them with a Baywatch princess, a Sharknado queen, and a bodice-ripper cover king. — A Catholic church in Michigan has increased attendance at Mass by jazzing up Communion. It sidelined the traditional wine and wafers, and uses modern pairings instead. At Easter Mass, a malty red lager stood in for the blood of Christ, and Ritz bacon crackers represented His body. Christmas Eve Communion…

The Republicans who are making a Michigan county like Florida — The Republican commissioners for Midland County, Michigan have gone above and beyond to “stop the woke spread of transgenderism.” They already prohibit surgery to change a person’s sex. That’s per their version of Florida’s “Don’t Say Gay Law.”¹ Now they’ve updated it to include people’s pets. …

I’m tired of her tugging the leash and jumping on men. — My name is Piper La Grange, I’m a female Border Terrier, and my human Mom has behavior problems. I don’t know what to do. Especially when I take her for walks down the street. She sniffs. She licks. She paws. …